The mole population has been growing for the last 4 to 5 years, and you woulda thunk that that nasty cold winter woulda killed off a decent percentage of the underground population. Such is not the case.

Moles are voracious insectivores. They search for earthworms, but will feast upon any living critter. As such, THEY DON’T EAT POISON PEANUTS OR JUICY FRUIT GUM! We wish those old wives tales would die a proper death. If your favorite nursery or garden center recommends such a silly practice, then stop supporting them.

As with any garden-destroying-mammal pest, vigilence is imperative for control. Moles will feed 2 to 3 times per day. That means they’ll go huntin’ for food. By virtue of fact that they’re digging tunnels right under the soil surface, they lift the sod. If you’re serious about wanting to control moles, you’ve got to walk the property every day, to “stomp the tunnels back down.” You don’t stomp them, actually, you just “walk-the-tight-rope” to push the tunnels back down. You do this to identify an active runway…the active runways will be pushed back up within 12 to 24 hours. The active runways are where you set your traps, or place your poison grubs/worms.

Here are the top 4 ways to kill the bass turds:

1) learning to set a mole trap is the most effective (and economical) way to control moles. If you’re not so damn lazy that you can’t walk your property every day, to ID the active runways (covered in the preceding paragraph), then you’re halfway there! Read some of the earlier posts on this page, to learn the secret of setting the harpoon trap.

2) Use Tomcat Mole Killer-Grub Formula. Still, you’ve got to identify the active runways. Get a stick and poke a hole in the active tunnel. Then, fetch a poison grub from the package (8 per box). Be sure NOT to touch the grubs with your human-scented fingers! Cut the wrapper with a pair of scissors, and use a stick to pry the “grub-shaped-grub-flavored” baited product out of the tray. Use the stick to push the grub into to hole in the tunnel, and then push the grub a few inches to either side of the hole. Then step the tunnel down. That way, Mr. Mole will cruise down the tunnel, pop the grub into his nasty mouth, and continue to feed for a day or two. The only way you’re gonna know that you whacked him is by stepping down those tunnels. If you’re too lazy to do this, you’ve got two other choices. Hire a pro, for about $150/killed mole, or quit bitchin.

3) Repel them with a castor oil-based product. At the MU Turf Day last summer, they confirmed that castor oil is a bona fide repellent of moles. For you greenies, who can’t bear to “whack ‘em,” this is a kinder, gentler option. We carry the Sweeny’s hose-end product…one quart treats 10M. Based upon the product label, you should concentrate the spray on the active tunnels. Are you getting the picture yet? Methods 1 to 3 all require some intelligence on your part…you’ve got to identify the active runways. The castor-oil products just keep the moles in the NEIGHBOR’S lawns! We figure 1 out of 3 of you guys can’t stand your neighbors! We hope we stocked enough product.

4) Call an expert and pay out the ass. Based upon what you’ve told us, the first mole costs anywhere between $125 and $160. The subsequent moles get cheaper. We can’t figure this one out…our solutions are far cheaper.